Phoenix...
I´ll never forget that day. I was turned to ashes and brought back to life, in fact, I think that was the day I was born to life. It was a normal day, everywhere I looked I would see gray. Gray people, gray streets, gray life. Gray life... I didn´t had a life, I was dead to it on the day I was born, ready to became another mindless drone with a production goal in a concrete society. I only had few hours a week to let go, to give in to my instinct, through martial practice. But my instinct in time became dormant, later being replaced by blind rage. I was no longer possessed the discipline required to perform a good practice. I no longer was at peace inside, I was dying.I had a house, I was productive and an angry beast trying to claw it´s way out. Free will had been erased, creative spirit was gone. I was nothing more than something that resembled a human being.
Again like every day I went to the bar at the end of the day with my co-workers, had a couple of drinks, listened to them complaining about work, about the boss, about the wife, kids. Like always I just listened, barely would say something. I couldn´t complain about work because it was always well done and I was on my way to promotion, my boss never was fair enough to do our job without pushing us around and I didn´t had any family to go to at the end of the day. Just an apartment like my life, empty.
That night a fragment of life decided to reveal itself. It was a warm night so I decided to walk home. I left everything at the office, briefcase, coat, tie, wallet, everything I only took my house keys. They said they would give a ride like always, bt this time the beast wasn´t clawing, it was being cunning. This time it was not using brute force, probably because it was tired, but it was still fighting. I walked down the streets, alone. I was feeling uncomfortable, so I pulled my sleeves up, loosen the collar button and it was like I began to breath. A strange vitality took over me, everything seemed different, people, buildings, cars, the air.
It was a 40 minutes walk but I didn´t care, everything around me felt more alive and that single feeling made the walk worth it. Without noticing the change, the air became different, a strange sensation, something was out of place and out of sight. It was the first time I felt that and before I realized it, a lightning crossed the skies, splitting them in two. The thunder came next, so loud I thought the skies were being torn apart and rain followed. First small drops, and then strong rain. I hide under balcony afraid of getting wet, then again it was just water. I moved to middle of the sidewalk and felt it falling on me, for the first time in years, I didn´t run from it. This rain was different, it was wet and yet, it didn´t feel like it. Sins were being washed away.
I kept walking home, slowly, enjoying the rain poring down my face. In few minutes it stopped, strangely I was less wet than I thought but wet non the less. It didn´t matter so I continued my journey home, lost in thoughts and sensations. Something was wrong, didn´t know how or where but it was there and it grew stronger. A bar. All of the sudden I was compelled to stay there on the sidewalk waiting, watching, listening. A thunder roared in the sky like beast being unleashed. The door opened and she walked outside with three thugs, drunk, behind her, trying to grab her. "Come on baby, let´s party" they said but she pushed them back. She couldn´t handle them, though I could feel in any other day she could have even talk the most insane man back to sanity. In a fraction of a second I caght a glimpse of her inner self. She was not herself that night, though I never found out why. Before I realized I was in the middle of the rumble. I took quite a beating. They didn´t remain untouched and it was enough for them to go way. It felt good, I was alive again and for the first time in years I did something, not for my daily activities but for someone else, a complete stranger. Three against one and all I got was a busted lip and some bruises. I was lucky, very lucky. I rested against the wall and slided to the ground. I sat there still feeling the rush. I started laughing.
- Are you crazy or just stupid?! You always do the knight in shiny armor routine?!
-No. Tonight I just had a death wish. And your welcome.
-Welcome for what? I could have handle them.
-They were three and they were drunk, I nearly didn´t make it and you´re telling me that you could handle them?! Are you super-woman or just high?! - I felt angry, another emotion dormant in me, but it almost blinded me so I didn´t realized it. It didn´t let me think, I just reacted. I got up in anger, the rush was gone but not the pain and now even worse. I got up to fast and the pain made me flinch and again was against the wall. This time not feeling an adrenaline rush but a pain rush. If I didn´t have a busted rib, it had been a really close call.
- Are you ok? -all of a sudden her tone had changed, aggressiveness changed to concern. She layed her hand on my shoulder and pain became numbness. A weird energy ran through my body, something warm, peaceful. It felt like a light was shining upon me, a blessing if you will. It was then I managed to see her, her short dark hair, smooth, beautiful skin and those exquisite brown eyes. I saw an entire world when our eyes met and the rest of the world vanished, there was nothing else besides both of us. It was nothing like I had felt before. I snapped back to reality and along with reality came pain again.
- Yeah. I´m fine.
-Yes, I can tell by the way you can hardly move with the beating you took that you are just fine. Come on, let me help you out.
- First, you almost beat the hell out of me because I tried to help you, now you are trying to help me?! Lady, you´re weird!
-Sorry, sometimes I´m a little rough and this hasn´t been exactly my week. Apparently this hasn´t been a good day for you either!
- Actually this has been the best day of my life so far.
- Getting the hell beat out of you is a good day?! And you say I´m weird!
- It´s a long story and I´m in too much pain to tell it. On the other hand I would welcome a drink or two.
- The only good place I would take you for a drink is at the beach. - that would mean going back and though it was tempting, the pain was starting to get to me. - And I´m not gonna take you there, instead I´m gonna take you to the hospital.
- I don´t need a hospital, I just need some rest.
- Fine. How far is your place?
- 20 minutes walking more or less.
- And you are gonna walk home? You know, you should really go to the hospital, you might have a broken rib or something.
- Trust me, I´me fine.
- At least let me take you home, it´s the least I can do.
- I´m fine, really.
- You don´t have anything else to prove me, you already done that by taking that beat. My car is right over there, I´ll get you there in a minute.
- Yes, mommy. - I couldn´t avoid saying that, she had been more protective about me in those few minutes than many people in my entire life. She smiled when I said that, but not an ordinary smile, she was challenging me, testing me, her eyes screamed out loud "You´re tough. Sure you can fight, but can you fight me?". Never I had a challenge like that.
- I´m not your mother and I´m not gonna give you a sponge bath or anything, though you need it since you´re all wet and bruised. But I can tuck you in.
- That´s more than I hoped today. I knew it had been a reason for me to stop by.
- What do you mean?
- It´s part of the long story that I will tell you later if I get the chance. - I held on to her and she helped me getting to her car. Before I knew it, I was in front of my building. And I didn´t gave her any directions. - How the hell did you know where I live?
- Easy. Corporate suit, walking down that street. I easily assumed you came from that office building near the beach and that you lived near enough to walk. Though your suit isn´t complete, I realized you hadn´t been mugged, otherwise you wouldn´t have helped me.
- Everybody has a suit! A shopkeeper has a suit!
-A shokeeper has an ugly suit probably for a wedding or something but not expensive suits like the one you are wearing. I´m a woman, I know clothes. And the rest of the suit you probably decided to leave it at the office, since it was a nice night and all.
- Impressive! And what about the building?!
- Lucky guess. But since you were traveling light I thought you could live here. If you can afford the suit, you can afford the place.- I didn´t realized if she was good enough to get to that conclusion or if she was just lucky, what mattered was, she was at my doorsteps. She helped me getting in the elevator. There was definitly something else going through my mind. - Tell me, do you smoke?
- No, why?
It was a 40 minutes walk but I didn´t care, everything around me felt more alive and that single feeling made the walk worth it. Without noticing the change, the air became different, a strange sensation, something was out of place and out of sight. It was the first time I felt that and before I realized it, a lightning crossed the skies, splitting them in two. The thunder came next, so loud I thought the skies were being torn apart and rain followed. First small drops, and then strong rain. I hide under balcony afraid of getting wet, then again it was just water. I moved to middle of the sidewalk and felt it falling on me, for the first time in years, I didn´t run from it. This rain was different, it was wet and yet, it didn´t feel like it. Sins were being washed away.
I kept walking home, slowly, enjoying the rain poring down my face. In few minutes it stopped, strangely I was less wet than I thought but wet non the less. It didn´t matter so I continued my journey home, lost in thoughts and sensations. Something was wrong, didn´t know how or where but it was there and it grew stronger. A bar. All of the sudden I was compelled to stay there on the sidewalk waiting, watching, listening. A thunder roared in the sky like beast being unleashed. The door opened and she walked outside with three thugs, drunk, behind her, trying to grab her. "Come on baby, let´s party" they said but she pushed them back. She couldn´t handle them, though I could feel in any other day she could have even talk the most insane man back to sanity. In a fraction of a second I caght a glimpse of her inner self. She was not herself that night, though I never found out why. Before I realized I was in the middle of the rumble. I took quite a beating. They didn´t remain untouched and it was enough for them to go way. It felt good, I was alive again and for the first time in years I did something, not for my daily activities but for someone else, a complete stranger. Three against one and all I got was a busted lip and some bruises. I was lucky, very lucky. I rested against the wall and slided to the ground. I sat there still feeling the rush. I started laughing.
- Are you crazy or just stupid?! You always do the knight in shiny armor routine?!
-No. Tonight I just had a death wish. And your welcome.
-Welcome for what? I could have handle them.
-They were three and they were drunk, I nearly didn´t make it and you´re telling me that you could handle them?! Are you super-woman or just high?! - I felt angry, another emotion dormant in me, but it almost blinded me so I didn´t realized it. It didn´t let me think, I just reacted. I got up in anger, the rush was gone but not the pain and now even worse. I got up to fast and the pain made me flinch and again was against the wall. This time not feeling an adrenaline rush but a pain rush. If I didn´t have a busted rib, it had been a really close call.
- Are you ok? -all of a sudden her tone had changed, aggressiveness changed to concern. She layed her hand on my shoulder and pain became numbness. A weird energy ran through my body, something warm, peaceful. It felt like a light was shining upon me, a blessing if you will. It was then I managed to see her, her short dark hair, smooth, beautiful skin and those exquisite brown eyes. I saw an entire world when our eyes met and the rest of the world vanished, there was nothing else besides both of us. It was nothing like I had felt before. I snapped back to reality and along with reality came pain again.
- Yeah. I´m fine.
-Yes, I can tell by the way you can hardly move with the beating you took that you are just fine. Come on, let me help you out.
- First, you almost beat the hell out of me because I tried to help you, now you are trying to help me?! Lady, you´re weird!
-Sorry, sometimes I´m a little rough and this hasn´t been exactly my week. Apparently this hasn´t been a good day for you either!
- Actually this has been the best day of my life so far.
- Getting the hell beat out of you is a good day?! And you say I´m weird!
- It´s a long story and I´m in too much pain to tell it. On the other hand I would welcome a drink or two.
- The only good place I would take you for a drink is at the beach. - that would mean going back and though it was tempting, the pain was starting to get to me. - And I´m not gonna take you there, instead I´m gonna take you to the hospital.
- I don´t need a hospital, I just need some rest.
- Fine. How far is your place?
- 20 minutes walking more or less.
- And you are gonna walk home? You know, you should really go to the hospital, you might have a broken rib or something.
- Trust me, I´me fine.
- At least let me take you home, it´s the least I can do.
- I´m fine, really.
- You don´t have anything else to prove me, you already done that by taking that beat. My car is right over there, I´ll get you there in a minute.
- Yes, mommy. - I couldn´t avoid saying that, she had been more protective about me in those few minutes than many people in my entire life. She smiled when I said that, but not an ordinary smile, she was challenging me, testing me, her eyes screamed out loud "You´re tough. Sure you can fight, but can you fight me?". Never I had a challenge like that.
- I´m not your mother and I´m not gonna give you a sponge bath or anything, though you need it since you´re all wet and bruised. But I can tuck you in.
- That´s more than I hoped today. I knew it had been a reason for me to stop by.
- What do you mean?
- It´s part of the long story that I will tell you later if I get the chance. - I held on to her and she helped me getting to her car. Before I knew it, I was in front of my building. And I didn´t gave her any directions. - How the hell did you know where I live?
- Easy. Corporate suit, walking down that street. I easily assumed you came from that office building near the beach and that you lived near enough to walk. Though your suit isn´t complete, I realized you hadn´t been mugged, otherwise you wouldn´t have helped me.
- Everybody has a suit! A shopkeeper has a suit!
-A shokeeper has an ugly suit probably for a wedding or something but not expensive suits like the one you are wearing. I´m a woman, I know clothes. And the rest of the suit you probably decided to leave it at the office, since it was a nice night and all.
- Impressive! And what about the building?!
- Lucky guess. But since you were traveling light I thought you could live here. If you can afford the suit, you can afford the place.- I didn´t realized if she was good enough to get to that conclusion or if she was just lucky, what mattered was, she was at my doorsteps. She helped me getting in the elevator. There was definitly something else going through my mind. - Tell me, do you smoke?
- No, why?
- `Cause I would really go for a smoke right now.
- You shouldn´t. Those things will kill some day.
- So does the knight in shiny armor routine if I don´t get to carefull.
- Good point. But if you quite perhaps you last longer next time! - She kept pushing, it was amazing the way she put my brain to work. I completely forgot I was in pain. For a while.
-Thanks a lot, lady. I´ll try to remember that next time your ass is on the line.
- What? You´ll stop smoking to help me out?
- Nop. Simply will keep on walking enjoying my smokes.
- What a cute thing like me and you wouldn´t hel me out?
- You´re not that cute.
- Yes I am. - the elevator doors opened. I managed to walk alone despite of my bruises. I opened the door and we both went inside.
- This is nice place though it looked bigger from the outside.
- I bought this place because of the view, not the space. Besides when one lives alone he doesn´t need much space.
- If it was for the view than this is a hell of a place you got there.
- Thanks. I´m gonna take a shower. Make yourself at home. - I was really beaten, red marks all over my body. Those were some ugly bruises. I would pass. That hot shower was also something wonderful, relaxing. Again sins were being washed away, to bad bruises weren´t. I put on some pants and went to the kitchen to grab some ice. As passed through the living room she was staring through the window, into ocean. - I can see you enjoyed the view as much as I did.
- Yes. It´s quite soothing considering it´s night time and you can´t much.
- I´m gonna grab some ice, you want something to drink?
- No thanks. I already had enough for one night.
- Ok suit yourself. - I grab the ice and came back to the living room, sat on the sofa and aplied it on my ribs. The inicial frost bite wasn´t very pleasant but it would have the desired results.
We kept ourselves quite for brief moments. It was pleasant and unconfortable, familiar and awkward. It was so confusing yet so enlightning. All this mix os sensations left me confuse and alive. It was all new, if I felt it before it was long forgotten and all this due to a bar brawl. No. Not a brawl. A girl. When it hit me, a lightning crossed the skies and with it a thundering roar as if the sky had been torn in two. Rain started falling. She smiled watching it.
- Why do I have the feeling that this rain is fault?!
- What?! I think you took a punch t many in that numb skull of yours! - Her tone of voice and her expression only made want to say "you´re a lousy liar". I just blacked out. I woke up in the next morning on the couch covered in a blanket. I felt reborn. A note was on the coffe table: "Thanks for the lovely evening and for playing the knight in shiny armor. Next time I won´t get you in trouble. I hope. You´re very cute when you are sleeping right to the part you start snoring."
- Got my ass kicked because of her and she complains about my snoring.
We kept ourselves quite for brief moments. It was pleasant and unconfortable, familiar and awkward. It was so confusing yet so enlightning. All this mix os sensations left me confuse and alive. It was all new, if I felt it before it was long forgotten and all this due to a bar brawl. No. Not a brawl. A girl. When it hit me, a lightning crossed the skies and with it a thundering roar as if the sky had been torn in two. Rain started falling. She smiled watching it.
- Why do I have the feeling that this rain is fault?!
- What?! I think you took a punch t many in that numb skull of yours! - Her tone of voice and her expression only made want to say "you´re a lousy liar". I just blacked out. I woke up in the next morning on the couch covered in a blanket. I felt reborn. A note was on the coffe table: "Thanks for the lovely evening and for playing the knight in shiny armor. Next time I won´t get you in trouble. I hope. You´re very cute when you are sleeping right to the part you start snoring."
- Got my ass kicked because of her and she complains about my snoring.
posted by Reaper at 3:55 da manhã
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